


Wrong Type of Person

by theonlyHANforme



Category: GOT7
Genre: Coming Out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-29
Updated: 2019-05-29
Packaged: 2020-03-27 15:05:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,360
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19015348
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theonlyHANforme/pseuds/theonlyHANforme
Summary: You knew Jackson was the sweetest and most accepting person in the world...but how would he react to this?(I suck at titles and summaries for one-shots SORRY)





	Wrong Type of Person

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this years ago and initially had it posted on another account buuuuut ultimately I took it down.
> 
> Reposting here because I no longer feel like hiding it in my email anymore haha
> 
> Also I've never actually experienced uh coming out so I really really hope what I wrote is believable so yeah.

Ding... Ding... Ding

The chime of the elevator seemed to get tauntingly louder as you ascended the building. You were late as it is, and you didn't ask for a reminder. Well, not late per se. Jackson had no idea that you were currently on the way to the dorm that day, you even stalled leaving your own apartment for as long as possible. Fumbling over the smallest of details that you knew in your mind would make no difference whatsoever. As if the way you dressed or how you styled your hair would affect how he would take the news.

Which was another thing - the news. The reason you couldn't accept it yourself sooner was that you didn't know how Jackson would react. Would he get frustrated and yell at you? Would he get angry and start throwing things around? Or would he get sad and just stare at you in disbelief? You knew Jackson better than you would say you did for yourself, but this was something you two never - and never thought you would - have discussed.

The metal doors rumbled opened, effectively removing you from your thoughts. The lightbulb flickered forebodingly overhead as you made your way towards their door. Upon your arrival at the building, you had taken notice that van was missing from its usual parking spot and you had silently hoped that it meant they weren't home. Yet the closer you got, the louder you could hear them and that hope jumped out the window. Judging from the volume of the clearly heard shouting, at least 4 of the members had to be home. Even if Jackson wasn't one of them, whoever it is would surely tell him that you came round. If that happens, it would be impossible to ignore and avoid him. You could turn around now and come back on another day, nobody would know of your cowardice other than yourself. That was something you could beat yourself up for on another day, too.

Now directly in front of their door, you raised your right hand as if to knock. Instead, you chose to look down at your outfit once more, somehow convinced that it would bring forth a different outcome. Just to make sure you didn't look too intimidating - not that you knew how to dress intimidatingly in the first place.

Maybe this was a mistake, you thought as you quietly rested your palm on the door, followed by your forehead. You felt exhausted from the emotional strain it took to bring yourself this far, frustrated that you were procrastinating to take this final small step forward. You were scared, terrified even; that much you could tell. The question is, of what exactly?

You lifted your head from the door and took a small step back, hand still on the door as if to push yourself off for a hurried departure. Taking a deep breath, you were just about to turn on your heel when the lift doors could be hear rumbling open once more. Gritting your teeth, you turned to see who it was that exited the lift. Still, on the door, your open palm clenched into a tight fist. It frustrated you that whoever it was had taken away your last chance at sweet escape, for you were sure to be seen now.

Regardless, you sighed deeply knowing that you would not have to go through the same emotional strain on a different day. Their footsteps could be heard now, soft but regular. It was Jinyoung who came around the corner of the walkway. He was casually dressed, his usual bag slung over his shoulders, earbuds hung around his neck and thumbs tapping away at the phone in his hands. His eyes glanced up briefly, probably to check how much further he had left to walk. You managed to release the tension in your jaw and coax your face into a sheepish expression before he properly looked up at you. Seeing that you were a familiar face and not a crazed fan, Jinyoung smiled and gave you a wave, one which you returned half-heartedly.

"So...are you the only one not in there?" you asked.

"I'm not sure about that, but I am the only one with a schedule today," he replied. "I assume so at least. It's our first proper free day in a while and we all need the rest. I take it that you're here to see Jackson?"

You nodded and moved out of the way to allow Jinyoung to unlock the door. You remember having read an article about Jinyoung having landed an acting role and wondered if his schedule today had anything to do with it. But before you could ask, he opened the door. The sheer volume smacked you in the face without the door acting as a barrier. You could hear screaming, laughing, groaning and the distinct sound of gunshots that for some reason you could not distinguish if it was from a game or from toy guns.

Jinyoung stepped in first and you followed behind him, chuckling nervously to yourself as you did. It has been months since you last visited, and it was brief and lighthearted. This time you knew you had a lot to say, with lighthearted being far from it. The guys were greeting Jinyoung in a distracted manner, but you had just come through the doorway. Jinyoung turned back to give you a questioning look and was just about to announce your presences when...

"OH FUCK!"

The following crash seemed to shake the whole apartment. Worried about what would have caused it, you forgot all about your nerves. Rushing into the living room after haphazardly kicking your shoes off, the sight in front of you was...impressive, to say the least. Jinyoung was blocking the hallway, which meant that while you could see the most of the scene you were still effectively hidden from everyone else's line of sight.

To be completely honest, you were not all that surprised. The only one missing from the living room was Youngjae, so you assumed that he was resting in his room. Though you wondered how he had yet to come out with all the noise the rest of them had been making. In front of you, Jinyoung shifted his stance in a way that would have looked accusing had you not been standing behind him. Mark, Jackson, Yugyeom and JB were all standing on various pieces of furniture and looked as if they had just been caught running around. The four of them kept glancing between Jinyoung and something on the floor. Yugyeom, Mark, and Jackson were seemingly trying to hold in their laughter, while JB kept opening and closing his mouth, unable to find the right words to explain the situation.

Seeing that their attention was preoccupied and would not be shifted to you anytime soon, you stretched to look over Jinyoung's shoulder to see what - or more specifically who - it was that made them repeatedly look towards the floor. Sprawled unceremoniously on the floor next to the coffee table was a groaning BamBam.

Since only one crash had been heard, you were relieved to know that he at least had not hit the table on his way down. His right foot was flat on the floor, slightly bending his leg. The other was outstretched, toes curling in. He was using his left hand to cover his eyes, whether it was to hide his embarrassment or his pain was unbeknownst to you. In his right hand was a toy gun. Upon closer inspection, you noticed that each of them held a similar gun in their own hands. It is also questionable how you had failed to have noticed the mess of stray foam bullets strewn all over the floor.

With a sigh - one that the members were all too familiar with - Jinyoung set down his bag and phone before stepping forward to assist BamBam back onto his feet. Unfortunately for you, this meant that your presence in the dorm was revealed to everybody. Their reaction to you was not, however, immediate. JB jumped down from the chair he was standing on to help Jinyoung, who must have been worn out from his individual schedule that day. The remaining three finally lost it and gave in to their laughter, which nearly caused Mark to take a fall of his own. you were left shuffling awkwardly in place, unsure of what to do next.

"If you guys were done laughing, maybe you would care to notice that we have a visitor standing in the doorway!" Jinyoung scolded, him and JB helping BamBam sit up straight in a chair. Well crap, there goes your plan to silently leave unnoticed and come back on a hopefully less eventful day. By now, Mark was using the wall behind him for support and Yugyeom was shaking silently on all fours. It was only Jackson who controlled himself when he heard the word 'visitor'; eventually, he took notice of you. He dropped his gun and left it to be forgotten somewhere on the floor before tackling you into a tight hug, nearly lifting you off of your feet. You were slightly disgruntled by it since you were on the scrawnier side and had been trying to gain some weight, but Jackson had always been known for his strength.

"Oh, when did you get here? And why didn't you call to say you were coming?" Jackson tried to sound annoyed but it was hard for him to hide the happiness in his voice. After a while, he finally let go of you, and by 'let go' you mean having only one arm around you instead of both. Jackson had always been one for physical contact, ever since both of you were still really young. It had always provided you with a sense of comfort before, but at that moment it only made you tense up. Trying to remove yourself from the contact, you scratched the back of your head and subtly pushed his arm off from its place around your shoulders. Hopefully, the action had been unintentional in Jackson's eyes.

"I've been pretty busy lately while studying for exams and all. My intent on coming here had been a last minute thing so it must have slipped my mind." That was a complete lie. while it was true that you were in the middle of your exams, you could not make yourself study for long. You were passionate enough for your course that - with all the hard work you're consistently putting in - you would be able to pass the exam anyway. Also, you had been contemplating coming over for weeks now and just never found the guts to do it until now, always making the smallest of excuses even. Even so, it had taken a lot of convincing and low-key threats from both your friends and family before you had enough confidence built up.

Mark and Yugyeom seemed to have finally calmed themselves down, but still, let out a laugh every now and then as they rested on the sofa. You heard a door open and turned only to see Youngjae cautiously poke his head out of his room to see what all the commotion was about. Seeing that the situation was mostly peaceful, he stepped out and, having taken notice of you, sent an enthusiastic wave in your direction. He headed to where Mark and Yugyeom were sitting, all while staring confusedly at BamBam.

Jinyoung and JB were still inspecting him for any serious injuries though he seemed to have sustained none. BamBam was groaning even more loudly than he had before and you suspected it was all for theatrics. This was proven true when he let out an over-the-top cry of pain a JB applied pressure on his ankle. It had earned him a smack on the back of the head, courtesy of Jinyoung. This time he actually did let out a cry of pain, though it sounded more like a strangled squeak. A sizeable bump had formed on the back of his head, and he squeaked once more when Jinyoung not-so-gently placed an ice bag on it.

"So," you said, ignoring the tension coiling tighter and tighter within you. "That was an impressive 'bam' you made when you fell."

At the sound of your voice, the four members who had yet to greet you looked up in surprise. Jackson, who had been standing by your side the entire time, had taken it upon himself to initiate the physical contact once more and now placed his elbow on your shoulder to use it as an armrest. You weren't significantly taller than Jackson, but even the small height difference would have made it an awkward position for him. As he did so, Jackson snickered at your statement.

"It was a beautiful day today. A sound of equal beauty and satisfaction had to made as BamBam goes 'bam'," Jackson mused jokingly.

"Hey, next time you visit makes sure the give us a heads up. We could have cleaned up the place," Mark teasingly complained. You smiled as his joke earned a laugh from everyone. Well mostly everyone, as you heard a scoff come from Jinyoung's direction. You knew that even if they had been informed prior to your visit, they still would not have cleaned up.

"When did you get here exactly? You looked as if you were ready to knock on the door when I got here," Jinyoung questioned. A quick look at your watch told you that it had been an hour and a half since you let your apartment. The bus ride would have taken 20 minutes, and all the walking no more than 10. So either you had been walking excruciatingly slowly or you had been unconsciously standing outside their door for a good hour or so. At the realization, you could feel your blush coming. Not wanting to embarrass yourself, you shrugged and said you had just arrived as well.

"So what pleasure do we owe you today?" It was Youngjae who asked the question, smiling widely at you. Although the question was innocent, and you had expected it to be asked in one form or another, recalling the reason you were there made you feel guilty all over again. You had no reason to feel that way either. Without providing an answer, you made your way to BamBam with Jackson in tow, pretending to not have heard. Also, you had taken mandatory first aid classes before and might be able to spot something that Jinyoung and JB had missed. They all watched you silently except for BamBam, who had his eyes closed. Finding nothing of interest other than slight swelling in his ankle - at which you got him another ice bag - you looked up to provide as vague of a reply as possible.

"I had something important to tell Jackson. As I said, it was quite rushed. Sorry for not telling you sooner," you explained. At your words, all the members looked at you expectantly. You shifted uncomfortably in place with their attention on you realizing that they expected you to just start talking. Turning to Jackson, you silently pleaded for his help. Seeing you discomfort, he took your wrist in his hand and was about to pull you with him into the kitchen, before changing course and heading into the room he shared with JB.

Inside, you made yourself at home and sat on the floor. Jackson, remembering to lock the door behind him, turned around to see you sitting cross-legged, leaning back with your arms supporting you, and letting out a heavy sigh. Your eyes followed him as he moved to sit on his bed, taking his blanket and wrapping it around himself, not forgetting to cover the top of his head. He always used to do it when you were both still kids, a form of 'protection' from you trying to pinch him while play wrestling. It comforted you to know that he still did so, and unconsciously you smiled at the memory. Jackson must have thought you were smiling for a different reason and pulled the blanket tighter around himself.

"You aren't planning to pinch me again, are you?" he questioned, playfully glaring at you. Shaking your head, you leaned forward and clasped your hands firmly together. For a while, the two watched each other while sitting in silence. Finally, you let out another sigh and Jackson raised an eyebrow at you questioningly.

"Tired?" he asked. You nodded, not wanting to admit that you still had no idea how to tell him what you needed to. You knew how to start, but not how to continue. Feeling the tension building up once more, you shifted your attention to other things in the room. Jackson continued to look at you, almost as expectantly as the other had been while you were standing outside, which made it hard to meet his eyes again.

What you didn't notice was the fear and worry in his eyes. Jackson knew that you had always been on the shy side, preferring to keep things to yourself until you had the privacy and felt secure enough to share it. Yet, you were almost as close to the other members as he was. As open to them as you would be to even your family. You had come to Korea a few years after he did for education, and by chance, it was in the same district where their dorm was. So when he saw you panic in front of them, seeing that you meant to talk to him alone, it frightened him.

When you finally looked at Jackson again, he was looking down at his feet. He was biting his lip in frustration, and you felt a rush of gratefulness towards him for not pressuring you into saying anything. Yet you knew you couldn't torture him by making him wait any longer. It was better to get it over and done with than waiting it out. Besides, it didn't matter if you hadn't planned out what you wanted to say, word for word.

"Remember how I never had any relationship until I got here?" you blurted out. Jackson's head shot up when he heard you say something, so it took him a while to make sense of it. He just scoffed and sat up straight, letting go of his hold on the blanket and allowing it to gather around his shoulders.

"No, I remember you refusing everyone who made an advance on you. Also, there was the complaining about how there was no one you were remotely interested in. Even your grandma made a comment that you never give anyone a chance," he reminded you. You blushed when he did, not expecting him to remember everything in such detail. You were going to reply with a sarcastic remark but decided that continuing would be a better choice, especially with the smirk Jackson was giving you.

"Anyway, since I came here I've been in countless relationships. I've tried so hard to make each and every one of them work but it always ends with me breaking up with my partner. You don't know how long I've been wondering if there was something wrong with me. None of them felt right..." you explained. Tears were welling up and you looked away again. The look on Jackson's face as he watched you was too intense, and you could see that he was trying to figure out what you were trying to tell him. You took in a few deep breaths to calm yourself down before you started talking again. As you did so, you used your sleeve to wipe away the few fallen tears. Seeing you do so, Jackson gently took your hand and tugged you up to have you sit next to him on the bed. He put one arm around your shoulders, the other still holding onto yours.

"I wasn't getting depressed, so you don't have to worry that much. I was just having a...conflict with myself. For a long time, I gave up on relationships and focused on my school work. I mean, that was what I was here for. I figured that maybe I just wasn't the type of person who was interested in relationships."

"Maybe," Jackson whispered. "Or maybe you should stop trying to find relationships and force them. It should happen naturally, you know. The right time with the right person."

"That was what my roommates told me at first, too, But at that time a few of them had steady relationships and I just wanted to be in one so badly," you cried out frustratedly, the emotions you felt then coming back to you. You pushed your hair out of your eyes and hung your head, not bothering to wipe away the tears this time.

"My roommates noticed me leaving our apartment late at night quite often. I didn't mean for them to find out, but I'd been frequenting the club nearby and lying about where I was really going. I was ashamed of myself for doing it and yet I couldn't stop. I'd hook up with random people, have meaningless flings and be in short relationships that I kept hidden from them. They confronted me about it one night as I was about to leave, and I just broke down in front of them and told them what I had been doing.

"They helped me out of it, I guess. Kept me busy so I'd stop going, somehow made me forget my need for a relationship. Then one afternoon while all of us were at the apartment, one of them brought it up again. Everyone else tensed up when she did, eyes flicking between me and her. She said that she might have figured out why I had such a hard time finding and staying in a relationship."

"You mean she was trying to help you get into a relationship, after seeing what all that trouble made you do?" Jackson fumed. He ran his hand through his hair and stood up. He walked back and forth next to the bed before he was full-on pacing. He couldn't believe what he just heard from you, and was hurt as to why you had kept it all from him until now.

"Don't you want to know what she said?" You were shocked by his sudden anger at this, as you had expected for him to only show emotion after you had told him everything.

"Hmm let's see, do I want to hear what your roommate said about how to fix your relationship problem about not being in one? You already said that all your previous relationships failed, what difference could she make?" he spat. You had to stop yourself from lashing out at him. You felt emotional yourself, and clearly, Jackson was allowing his anger to cloud his judgment.

"It made a lot of difference, Jackson," you slowly said. You grabbed his hand to stop him from pacing, but when you tugged to have him sit again he didn't follow.

"She said that I was looking for the wrong type of person."

"So that was the thing she came up with? She thought the problem was your type? It would have been a genius answer if you had only been dating similar people then!" Jackson scowled as he thought about the answer, convinced that it had made no difference.

"That wasn't what she meant, Jackson," you sighed, standing up to face him.

His face was still contorted in a look of anger, so you took both his hands in yours and squeezed them slightly. Letting one go, you lifted his head so he'd look you in the eye. Immediately, his expression changed to one of worry when he saw your tear-streaked face. He was still angry, no doubt about that, but you still had something to tell him. He could afford to control his anger until then.

"When I was on the way here to tell you all this, I was so worried about how you'd react. I didn't expect you to get so worked up from the story alone.

"When she said that I was looking for the wrong type of person, she did not mean personality-wise. She meant the actual person."

Jackson looked at you questioningly, not understanding what you meant. You looked down at your feet and took in a deep breath. Then looking him straight in the eyes...

"I'm gay, Jackson."

There was no immediate reaction from him, but you made sure not to break eye contact. Jackson opened his mouth to say something nothing came out. Jackson stood floundering like a fish and you continued to stare. Finally, he closed his mouth and gulped. Without warning, with you still holding his hand, he pulled you forward into a tight hug.

"Is this what you were so afraid to tell me?" he whispered, placing his head on your shoulder. You said nothing and just melted into the hug, still not exactly sure what it meant but feeling relieved nevertheless. When the two of you pulled apart, Jackson wiped away your tears with his hand and gave you a reassuring look.

"If you were afraid I wasn't going to accept you, then what kind of friend would I be? You're still the same person, no matter your sexuality. Especially if being who you are, makes you happier, then I'd support it with all my heart," he announced. You felt giddy with happiness at his words as you smiled widely. His stern expression assured you of his sincerity as he looked deftly into your eyes. You threw your arms around him and pulled him into another hug.

"Thank you," you whispered.

"I just hope that you don't think I'd be less protective of you around your partner, even if you guys are the same gender. And safe sex rules still apply."

Shocked by his words, you withdrew from the hug to slap him hard on the shoulder.

"I hate you so much, and yes I know."


End file.
